©
I'm a short, 21 year old "Self-Aware American" who will post anything from personal rants to minecraft, halo, cats, foxes, art, anime, movies, feminism, and more.

sosickweredead:

After 10 years of hearing kitchen, sandwich, driving, fake geek girls, being physically weak, and PMS Jokes. I do not care about hurting the feelings of boys with (stereotypically masculine) jokes.

http://sosickweredead.tumblr.com/post/79411745169/after-10-years-of-hearing-kitchen-sandwich
A steel automail leg... and right arm! 
http://shizachi.tumblr.com/post/87599018003/a-steel-automail-leg-and-right-arm
http://syndromestore.com/products/10090470-sweet-deer-hoodie
Me:
*playing Tomb Raider*
Grandmother who is visiting for the weekend:
Mind if I sit with you?
Me:
*squirming slightly because there is gore and swearing in this game and my grandmother is a sweet old lady: Um, if you want to.
Grandmother:
*sits* Thank you, dear.
Me:
*continuing to play for about five minutes*
Grandmother:
Grandmother:
Grandmother:
LOOK OUT THERE ARE THREE COMING DOWN THE HILL
Grandmother:
THAT WAS POINT BLANK HOW ARE THEY ALIVE
Grandmother:
OOOHH YOU MADE THAT EXPLODE
Grandmother:
STOP KILLING MY GRANDDAUGHTER
Grandmother:
KILL THEM KILL THEM ALL
Grandmother:
OHHHHH YOU SHOT HIM IN THE HEAD OHHHHHHHHH
Grandmother:
RUN RUN RUN YOU'RE ABOUT TO DIE RUN
Grandmother:
OKAY NOW KILL THEM ALL
Me:
*slowly turns to look at her* Grandma
Grandmother:
*sweet smile* Hmm?
Me:
Grandma oh my god
Grandmother:
*more smiling* Well, hurry up and kill everyone else, I want to see you save this Sam person.
Me:
Me:
Grandmother:
Kill them.
http://frozen-in-childhood.tumblr.com/post/99080311998/me-playing-tomb-raider-grandmother-who-is

thewanderlustlibrarian:

elysedc:

The ultimate dad joke compilation

Reblog for “Robeneros”

http://elysedc.tumblr.com/post/99526215133/the-ultimate-dad-joke-compilation

heart-filled-with-hope:

If you’re battling a mental illness and didn’t want to wake up this morning but did anyways, you’re a motherfucking badass. Because living with a mental illness is hard and I’m damn proud of you for still being here and fighting. You’re metal as hell and tough as nails. So keep on fighting, you kickass Viking warrior. You can win this.

http://heart-filled-with-hope.tumblr.com/post/78121980926/if-youre-battling-a-mental-illness-and-didnt

undeniableking:

2radd:

angrythecake:

poeticslave:

kyriasmith:

beben-eleben:

During a robbery, the bank robber shouted to everyone in the bank: “Don’t move. The money belongs to the State. Your life belongs to you.”

Everyone in the bank laid down quietly. This is called “Mind Changing Concept” Changing the conventional way of thinking.

When a lady lay on the table provocatively, the robber shouted at her: “Please be civilized! This is a robbery and not a rape!” 

This is called “Being Professional” Focus only on what you are trained to do! 

When the bank robbers returned home, the younger robber (MBA-trained) told the older robber (who has only completed Year 6 in primary school): “Big brother, let’s count how much we got.” 

The older robber rebutted and said: “You are very stupid. There is so much money it will take us a long time to count. Tonight, the TV news will tell us how much we robbed from the bank!” 

This is called “Experience.” Nowadays, experience is more important than paper qualifications! 

After the robbers had left, the bank manager told the bank supervisor to call the police quickly. But the supervisor said to him: “Wait! Let us take out $10 million from the bank for ourselves and add it to the $70 million that we have previously embezzled from the bank”.

This is called “Swim with the tide.” Converting an unfavorable situation to your advantage!

The supervisor says: “It will be good if there is a robbery every month.” 

This is called “Killing Boredom.” Personal Happiness is more important than your job.

The next day, the TV news reported that $100 million was taken from the bank. The robbers counted and counted and counted, but they could only count $20 million. The robbers were very angry and complained: “We risked our lives and only took $20 million. The bank manager took $80 million with a snap of his fingers. It looks like it is better to be educated than to be a thief!” 

This is called “Knowledge is worth as much as gold!” 

The bank manager was smiling and happy because his losses in the share market are now covered by this robbery. 

This is called “Seizing the opportunity.” Daring to take risks! 

So who are the real robbers here?

Oh

Wow… If you don’t read this, you’re wilding.

This is rather relevant to how I ended up in my job position…

wow

Dammnnn

http://beben-eleben.tumblr.com/post/61297074822/during-a-robbery-the-bank-robber-shouted-to

askfordoodles:

kindamindless:

I laughed way too much

that is the most cartoony wildlife footage ever captured.

http://gifak-net.tumblr.com/post/98039274289

I think the saddest people always try their hardest to make people happy

because they know what it’s like to feel absolutely worthless

and they don’t want anyone else to feel like that.

-- Robin Williams  (via taurielsilvan)

http://skateeofmind.tumblr.com/post/94513114478/i-think-the-saddest-people-always-try-their
http://animefan214.tumblr.com/post/99529832449